DIARY OF AN EVIL HENCHMAN
By Anonymous
Edited By Chuck Loridans

 





July 18th, 1947


  What a long day.

  It feels like months since I last wrote anything in the journal.

  So much happened since I got up this morning, jeez! I’m glad to see that damned Marya Island fade from view, I wish the ocean would just swallow it up!

   Okay, so the day didn't start out so bad. When I was having my third cup of Joe in the galley, Bay City Bottems, came up to me.

   “Hey, I gotta surprise for ya” Bay City, said with a goofy grin.

   “What is it Bay?” I asked.

   He reached into his inner jacket pocket and pulled out a rolled up piece of poster paper. He handed it to me, and I unrolled it.


  It was a promotional poster for MacDougals House of Horrors, with a big picture of Loren Belasco, as the Vampire King. The actor was holding the cape up, on each side like he was about to fly away, and an evil grin on his puss.


  “You know, for your kid, like you wanted” Bay City said, fidgety, while he waited for me to say something.


   “Bay, this is great!...thanks pal” I said, maybe a little choked up. “How’d ya get it?”

   “I stole it, ya lummox!...how else!” He told me.

I was about to ask him exactly how he managed to filch it but we were interrupted by Durant.

  “All right youse mugs...” Durant bellowed at all of us in the galley, “...we are about to dock at Marya Island, so get on your work clothes, ya got a lot more liftin' and totin' ta do!”.


  I gulped down the rest of my coffee, ran to my cabin, and stashed the poster in my foot locker, then hustled out to the deck.


  I didn't need to change clothes as Durant suggested, as I have a tendency to dress the same no matter what I do.


  My black trousers, black Arrow shirt, my tweed, suit jacket (that I've had since 35. It’s ragged and worn, and Meg keeps telling me to throw it away,
but I can't, it would be like throwing away a best friend) and my beat up Derby hat are good for all occasions. Well, some bosses insist on all henchman, wearing fedoras, so I always pack one, but that’s neither here nor there.

  We soon lowered a smaller boat, and a crew of about six of us climbed in, with Durant.

  It was me, Bay City Bottems, Boom Boom Lewis, Gorilla Nealis, Sharp Wally, and Herby boy. Oh yeah the lovely Nesta Reynolds, tagged along. Tully was supposed to join us but declined. I assumed it was because he didn't want to deal with Durant, but judging by what happened later that evening, I wonder if it was something else.

  Muggy didn't go either, Durant didn't even want him along. Durant decided Muggy needed to swab the entire deck, once more. Durant is a rotten son of a.....

  Anyway, it took us all of ten or so minutes to reach the shore.

  I've got to say, even from the deck of the ship, Marya Island, looked pretty darn spooky. What with the dark, ugly mountain, that Nesta say’s used to be a volcano, or may STILL be a volcano. It didn't get any cheerier the closer we got.

  There was a rickety old dock, on the shore, and a couple of cottages and huts scattered here and there along the beach.
Further up towards the base of the mountain we could make out a mansion, actually more like a castle. More on that later.

  So we made to the dock, and got out of the boat.


  I tried to help Nesta on to the deck, but slipped, and almost fell in to the drink.

  Nesta somehow caught me, and wound up helping me on to the deck. That dames got muscles! The guy’s had a good laugh, and I laughed with them. Durant wasn't amused at all, but who gives cares.


  We were greeted buy a little squirly, wild eyed, British guy, and a small group of Negro’s all wearing tropical looking shirts, baggy shorts and straw hats.


  The British guy introduced himself as P. Schubert, and said he was the overseer of Doctor Lejos’ plantation.


   Dr. Lejos? This was the first I had heard of him.


  I found out later that we were to be bringing the Doctor and his bodyguard with us on our voyage, but I’m getting ahead of myself.


   We were told we would meet Dr. Lejos, at his mansion later for dinner, that the Dr. would especially love to entertain, the lovely Miss Reynolds.


  Yeah, him and every guy on the ship!


   We were lead up a path, a little closer to spooky mansion, where we found a stack of crates waiting for us to move.


  Jeez! More crates!


  Schubert, told us that the Negro's would help us in moving the crates to the ship, and asked Nesta if she would like to sit under the shade, with a nice glass, of iced tea.

  Nesta declined, and said she would rather give us a hand... what a women.


  Durant didn't seem to like the idea, but said nothing. He did however say that he would take the offer of the iced tea, and proceeded to lay back in a hammock, that barely seem to support his great bulk.


  “Get TA work!” he ordered, and we did.


  Nesta was handy, pulling her weight with the best of us men, and we were grateful! It took us all of six or seven hours to get the job done.


  It’s too bad this primitive island set up had no block and tackle, type equipment, woulda cut our time done by several hours.


  Funny thing, some of the smaller cargo we took to the ship turned out to be four coffins, go figure!


   During a smoke break, I got to know one of the Negroes. (He and I smoked the same brand, so I bummed off him) He was a young fella, named Dwayne, and said he hoped to get off this island and go to college someday.


  I suggested he leave with us, and maybe I could show him around the States, after this job. He said he would have to talk to his employer, but he liked the idea.


  Well, we got all the moving done, and Durant told us to ****, shower and shave, as we had to go eat dinner at the Doctors place.


  Why I had to go, I can't figure. I hate these things, and Durant ordered me to wear a tie!


  “Oh well...” I thought “I hope the grub is good”.


  The boat ride back to the island a nice little moon light row. (As we had already stored the cargo boat back on the ship, we took a smaller row boat)


  It was just us guy’s who had moved the Stuff, with Durant, Prof.. Sanders, and Nesta, going.


  Nesta!...wow! ...was she decked out! Her hair all done up, and she wore a long, shiny red, gown. She cleans up real nice. Her high heels added another couple a inches to her tall frame.


  Bay City, wore his stupid looking wide polka dot tie, that he thinks makes him look good. Durant wore his Zoot suit, he looked like a striped zeppelin.

  I just wore my clip on Bow-tie, I never learned how to tie the real McCoy, why bother?


  We made it to the entrance of the Mansion, a huge double door, with a big, bronze, scary looking gargoyle looking door knocker. Durant seemed to enjoy using the knocker, maybe it reminded him of a relative.


  Schubert let us in, and told us that Dr. Lajos would be with us soon. We walked in to the parlor, and I nosed around. This place was even spookier on the inside.


  Jeez, now I know, that back in my bachelor days, no one would accuse me of being the tidiest guy around, but this place took the cake! What with the huge spider webs, hanging all over the place, rat’s and armadillo’s scurrying around and the DUST!....yikes!


  I accidentally bumped into one the old looking tapestries, hang on the wall, and the dust came swirling around me. For a second there, I thought the
Gray Fog might be around..... no, just dust, lots and lots of dust. I had a short coughing fit, because of it.


  Anyway, moldy, old Tapestries, strange looking statues, creepy paintings on the wall, and the whole place was lit, by what seemed to be a hundred or so candles, all in antique, looking candle holders. Prof. Sanders seemed to be in heaven as he examined each and every object in the room.


  Our poking around was cut short by Schubert announcing “Ah, Dr. Lajos ....your guests’ are here!” We looked up, and saw our host. He was at the top of the winding stair case.


  “I bid you....welcome” the man said.


  Yikes! this place seemed as cheery as an ice cream parlor, compared to it’s owner! He was a regal looking palooka, in a black tuxedo, with a long black opera cape TA boot. I’ll be damned if he didn't remind me of Loren Belasco, himself!


  He not only dressed like Belasco, but seemed to be around the same height, only, where Belasco had brown hair, this galoot had hair as black as pitch, which came down on his fore head in a sharp widows peak.


  “Gentlemen and lady, may I introduce you to your host.... DR. Lajos” Schubert said with an insane look in his eyes.


   Dr. Lajos bowed, and began to descend the stairs. Following behind the doctor, was a huge mountain of a goon. When we noticed the huge man, several of us, let out a gasp.


  “Do not be frightened of my bodyguard, he is harmless, unless, I am being threatened” Lajos said, with what he probably thought was a warm smile.


  Do not be frightened, easy for him to say.


   When they reached the foot of the stairs, we all got a closer look at his ‘bodyguard’. He must have been over seven feet tall, not counting the
silly top hat he wore, which almost covered his eyes. His eyes were actually covered by sun glasses, the kind the movie stars in Hollywood, have taken to wearing. His suit seemed to barely, fit his awkward frame, and he moved with a slow, lumbering walk, like he would fall over at any moment.

 

  The bodyguard seemed less talkative then Champ, in fact he never said anything. He just followed along behind Dr. Lajos, like a trained dog.


  Lajos, passed by each of us, barely even noticing, we were there, which seemed to annoy Durant to no end, and made his way to Nesta.


  “Ah... such a lovely creature” Lajos said with a thick accent, as he kissed Nesta’s hand. Nesta, seemed impressed. Jeez, I was hoping a gal like
Nesta would see through that kinda baloney. No dice. She almost swooned as Lajos, looked up from her hand, into her pretty eyes.


  Lajos, released her hand, and gestured with his other arm, to an archway.


  Through the archway, was the dining room. Fancy, Schmancy, if you didn't pay attention to the occasional rat, armadillo, or opossum, scurrying about.

  We all sat down, with Dr. Lajos at the head. His bodyguard stood motionless behind him. Nesta sat to the doctors right, Durant to his left. Dwayne came in, through what I assumed was the kitchen door. He was dressed in a shabby suit, and had a bottle of wine that he carried on a tray.


  So poor Dwayne had to double as a waiter, on top of his heavy labor, outdoors.


  Dwayne poured wine into each of our goblets, except for Dr. Lajos.


  “Not a wine drinker, Dr. Lajos?” Nesta asked, breaking the ice.


  “I ...” Lajos began, but seemed to decide against saying, whatever it was he was about to say. Instead he just waved Dwayne away.


“Perhaps I will drink later...” Lajos said, politely, “..but, I implore, my guest not to follow my example.... Please, enjoy the wine, it is an excellent vintage.”


  As I sipped my wine, I looked up past the doctor, to his bodyguard. Jeez Louise, if he didn't get uglier every time I snuck a glance at him. He just stood there like a statue, and I noticed his skin, almost had a greenish tint to it.


   Another weird thing was, even though it was tropical weather, this big ape, not only wore a top hat indoors, but he also had a thick scarf, wrapped around his neck, and he wasn't even sweating.


  I couldn't look anymore, I just waited for a conversation to start, to kill the spooky silence. Finally, Durant spoke up.


  “So, Dr. Lejos, as I understand it, you are Dr. Prometheus partner on this job.”


   “Yes, Mr. Durant, Dr. Prometheus and I have collaborated, on many.... projects in the past.” Lajos answered “I have added my wealth and knowledge to his own, to reach our common goals.”


“And what goals, might they be?” Nesta asked. Whatever spell, she might have been under, was broken, and she now seemed to have a sly, look in her eyes.


  “Nothing, that a woman, as lovely as yourself, need be concerned about, my dear.” Lajos replied in his stuffy, smug way.


  “That’s right toot’s ...” Durant broke in “..leave the business gab to us men. Now I have a question or two, DR .Lajos, fer instance.....”


   “I am afraid, that, as you say, in America, is ‘none of your business’ as well, Mr. Durant!” Dr. Lajos replied sharply, while raising his hand to
silence Durant. “As I understand it, you and your men, are to follow orders, and not to question your betters!”


  “My betters!” Durant said yelling and boiling mad. “I’ll show you my ‘betters’!”


  Durant began to rise menacingly, staring coldly at Dr. Lajos, but was quickly lowered back down in to his seat by Lajos’ bodyguard. Tall, dark and ugly, used just one hand to shove Durant’s bulk downward.


  “Why I oughta...” Durant never got to say, what he oughta, and we all heard the low growl that came from the bodyguard’s lipless mouth, letting him know that he oughta, not.


   “I will forgive your rashness, this once, Mr. Durant...” Lajos said, raising one eyebrow “but see that you remain civil, in the presence of the Lady, and myself”


  Durant said nothing, but I have the feeling, if he could get the Doctor, away from his bodyguard, just for a second, there would be plenty of trouble. Durant would say to hell with the pay, and put Lajos, six feet under.


  “I trust all of my cargo, was safely, transported to your sea-vessel?” Lajos asked. Durant, didn't answer, he just sipped his wine, and looked around the room, with hate in his eyes.


  “We got it all on board Dr. Lajos!” Herby Boy said, with a stupid grin like he was trying to win points.


  “Say!..why for, all the coffins, Dr. Lejos?..they were pretty heavy.... Got some bodies in em?” I think Herby Boy lost some points, by asking that.


   “Family heirlooms, you need no more explanation then that” Lajos responded, for some reason being a little nicer to Herby Boy, then he was to
Durant.


  “Are the coffins safely stored in my private cabin?” Lajos asked.


  “Sure thing Dr. Lajos, all safe and sound!” Herby Boy responded.


  “Miss Reynolds...” Lajos said, turning his attention back to Nesta, I look forward to spending time with you, once we reach Farou island.”


  “I am sure we will see a lot of each other, on the ship Doctor” Nesta replied, and I could swear she was batting her long eyelashes at him.


  “Unfortunately, I will spend most of my time, in my cabin, as I have a tendency to become ill, while traveling across, moving water.”


  So what?, I thought, most everyone of us mugs, have put in our shifts, hanging our heads over the railing, depositing our dinners into the drink. You don't see us hiding in our cabins. What a sissy!


  “But..” Lajos continued, “Perhaps, you might drop by my cabin, so that I might entertain you before the vessel departs”.


“Perhaps, dear Doctor, I’ll do just that” Nesta replied, with a sly grin.

  I hoped she was only kidding, I hoped that a dame like Nesta, was to smart to fall for the doctor’s game. I would find out how smart she was later.

  “Dr. Lajos...” Prof Sanders broke in, “I am fascinated by some of the treasures here in your house, could you tell me the story behind.....blah blah blah?”

  The dinner pretty much continued from there, with Lajos flirting with Nesta, Prof. Sanders asking four dollar questions, Durant silently fuming, the bodyguard making like a statue, and the rest of us gobbling up our...what was it called?...roast peasant?

  It was time to go. The Doctor’s bodyguard picked up several suitcases and we headed for the door.

  Out side Doctor Lajos, seemed to be giving Schubert some last minute instructions, on running the island while he was gone.

  The path to the dock, was lit by Tiki torches every ten feet or so.

  As we made our way to the dock, I could see out of the corner of my eyes, groups of people standing just out side of the torches light. I searched to see if I could spot Dwayne, I felt guilty, that I didn't try to speak to Dr. Lajos, about letting him come with us.


  I didn't see Dwayne, but what I did see, chilled me to the bone. These weren't the regular citizens of Marya island that I had seen during the day.


   As I said, at that point they were kind of standing around in the dark, standing real still, but there was something about these natives that made me feel uneasy. I tried to shake it off, as we arrived at the dock.


  “Okay, there is only room in the row boat for seven of us, three of you is gonna hafta wait till we get the Doctor, Nesta, and the Professor safely on board, then we’ll send the boat back.”


  He pointed to me, Herby Boy and Bay City.


  “You, you and you, stay” he ordered, and they climbed into the row boat and were off to the ship.


  The three of us looked at each other, silently for awhile, as the boat disappeared form the torch light.


   “Gotta smoke?” Bay City asked me.


   “Nope” I said as I patted my jacket pocket “Left em on the ship..... Herby Boy?


  “Nah, I don't smoke!” Herby Boy replied.


   “Damn!” Bay and I said in unison. I sure as hell needed a smoke at that point.


  We stood there, once more silent. I’m pretty sure Bay and Herby Boy, were feeling just as spooked as me, and if they weren't I’m sure they got that way, once they started hearing the sound of a lot of footsteps in the grass behind us.


   “Um.... they should be back to get us any time now” Bay City said nervously.


  “You betcha!” I replied, “Any time now!”


  The footsteps were getting closer, they weren't running footsteps, but footsteps headed in our direction, all the same.


  They were getting closer to the torches, so I was finally able to make out more details about them.


  I wish I hadn't, I wished I was blind at that point. These were some strange looking folks, Negro’s most of em, with a white man, here and there.


  The more I could see of them, the more I was filled with dread. They moved real clumsy, clumsier then Lajos bodyguard. The clothes they wore, were tattered and ragged. They looked skinny, as if they had not eaten in a year. And the eyes! Dear mother their eyes looked like someone had forced golfballs in to their sockets with a hammer!

  They were getting closer and closer, not saying a word....kinda moaning though.

   “Hi fellas” Herby Boy said, trying to sound cheerful.

  “Say!..I don't suppose one of you would have a cigarette, on yez?....It’s not for me, see I don't smoke, but my chums here...”


  Herby Boy stopped talking, because he realized they weren't listening.


  They were about twenty feet away from us, and moaning louder and louder, just looking right at us, like....


  Oh jeez, this is getting to me, I’ll write down the rest, after I've had a smoke.